This evening I watched as my son retrieved rings from the bottom of the pool, a surprise to all of us. The joy and the pride that lit upon his face was magical. He looked around to see if anyone had actually seen what he had just done. And suddenly he was dunking himself underwater seeing how long he would last, testing this new thing against himself and deciding what he was capable of. It was amazing to see it happen, learning visibly lived out in front of me. I felt like I was looking in on Newton and the apple, discovering gravity. It's a process that we so often lose as adults. In childhood, teen years, or if you're lucky, you won't experience this until adulthood, we decide or are told that we should be good at something from the first time we publicly try it. We can practice all we want at home, but once in public, we should have it down. And then the joy of the learning process disappears. Without encouragement, our children can lose their boldness to the wide world of perfection. How sad to see a change from joy and testing and accomplishing and to instead see fear and trepidation. While we can't always control that or blame ourselves if that happens, we can keep our eyes open. Open to the possibilities, open to what is happening in our child's life, and even open to modeling a life full of testing, failure, and accomplishment in front of them. It's something I myself may have to be re-taught by my children, and then holding onto that process my life can reflect the joy of learning back to them.
It was not only my son who caught my eye, but another little boy. He began the lesson standing beside the pool. The look in his eyes was wary of even touching the water. Back and forth the instructor slowly included him in the games they were playing and soon a toe dunked itself in the pool. Then a step, then sitting on the steps...still unsure if he would join in. But the end of the night he had found his courage and was in the pool walking around and somewhat enjoying himself. It was inspiring. My heart wanted to stand up and applaud him and acknowledge the steps he had taken to enter into life. And I left wondering what it would be like if we applauded each other in every day life more often. If, when we see a friend take a step toward something new, dip a toe in, maybe fall in only to gasp for air, but to begin the process of seeing themselves and exploring how they want to live life and instead of silently standing by we encouraged them, hoped for them, and applauded even the little steps. I hope at the end of my life I have found myself and my family surrounded by people who live together in a world that is always expanding, a world that feels new and full of potential.
We are cynical folks here in the city and we don't usually like to admit that we don't know or haven't experienced everything, but that cynicism holds us back keeping us from stepping out, finding our courage, and swimming into all the potential we have. My goal has always been to be in the pool swimming instead of relishing looking down at the water full of excitement and joy at what could happen. So here we stand, our family, looking down into the future, we have goals and dreams, but right now we are wary and unsure of what each step will bring. And I've been given a lesson, by two children, on courage, joy, and experiencing the process of growth. I guess I will follow their lead. It might be a tiptoe or a leap, but here we go, we're taking steps.
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